by Cesaria Yaos on Oct-15-2004

Look at me with my perfect little middle-class suburban life.

My perfect little house with its white siding and green trim with its perfect soothing paint job within that matches with everything else in the house intentionally.

My perfect little job with its middle of the road pay and an office building with all the other perfect people.

My perfect little Japanese car with its perfectly cute little Tweety floormats that I never removed when I bought it and with its perfect gas mileage.

My perfect suburban pre-mommy haircut that is long enough to be flattering but not long enough to be sexy.

My perfect little suburban body that is neither too fat to be disgusting or too skinny to make the other suburbanites envy me.

My perfectly classicly conservative suburban wardrobe that is a mix of things that never go out of style and were never really ever in style in the first place.

My perfect suburban pets who are spoiled rotten in lieu of any crotch droplings with their little matching collars, harnesses and leashes who go outside with Mommy and Daddy like perfect little cats.

My perfect little suburban friends who are neither intelligent nor interesting and the perfect little Saturdays we get together for board games and barbeques where the only way I can handle it is to get as drunk as possible.

My perfect suburban relationship with its perfect schedule of sex 3-4 times per week which makes me the envy of all other suburbanite women who are getting it once a week or month.

My perfect little suburban life that I used to sneer at others for having and used to proclaim I would never get trapped in.

I wonder if all this perfection would shatter like cheap glass if I screamed loud and long enough.


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